Cops Behaving Badly
by TheBlackerTheBerry
Summary: Two cops are sent on a surveillance job on a group of petty offenders. They start getting bored and get clumsy. It pays off.


_**Hi y'all. I know it's been decades,plus one since I posted and this serves**_

_**as an apology to all of you for my silence. My muse died due to**_

_**circumstances but I've managed to revive it. Hope you enjoy it enough to**_

_**forgive me.**_

**I own nada..just the plot.**

Randy yawned and leaned further back in the passenger seat of the police car and rested his hands behind his head. He began dozing off as he waited for his partner, John Cena, to bring the food. The door to the car opened and John noisily placed two bags and two large sodas between the seats startling Randy out of his nap.

"What took you so long man? I'm starving." Randy asked as he sat up and grabbed one bag.

"Don't get cranky with me dude. Burgers don't exactly make themselves." was John Cena's reply as he dug into his bag and pulled out a juicy beef burger and took a large bite.

Randy just shook his head and dug inside his own bag retrieving his own meal. They had been on a stakeout on a certain group of young unruly men that had been terrorizing businesses on the downtown Business street. The night was slow and the cops were getting bored because they had not seen anything out of the ordinary and it was already close to two in the morning.

"This is worse than having your ass whipped by an overzealous hooker on E!" Randy grumbled.

John roared with laughter clapping his hands, at Randy's statement. "Sorry, an overzealous who? You into role play nowadays, Randy?"

"Shut the fuck up Cena! You would know better because you like having your ass spanked."

John laughed again, making Randy join in. "I don't like having it spanked,but I can't help it if people love my ass." Randy nodded laughing as he took a sip of his soda. "Please don't obsess over your ass again John. You don't even know if they spank it because they love it."

"What's not to love about all this Randy?" John replied rubbing his ass,a gesture that made Randy laugh. "You can admit you love it too buddy. I won't hold it against you I promise."

Randy smiled shaking his head in amusement. "I'd admit it if I did. Truth is, it's not all that."

John's jaw dropped in mock shock."What do you mean it's not all that? Guys offer cash for it Randy. I'm telling you dude, if I were a hooker, this would be my money minting machine because I would be shitting dollars,literally!"

Randy laughed so hard he accidentally knocked his drink which spilled all over his crotch. "Fuck!" He cursed. "Hand me the towel John!"

John threw him the hand towel,with which Randy dubbed his now wet jeans. "Shit! Now I have a wet stain on my fucking crotch. If there was an op, how the hell would I spring into action?"

John stifled a laugh,covering it with a cough. "Relax Randy. It doesn't look that bad."

Randy cut his eyes at John. "Easy for you to say. You're not the one with cold soda travelling up your crack." John emitted a loud laugh that saw Randy narrow his eyes at him again, half angry half amused. "You laugh all you want Johnny. We'll see how much I help you when Vince starts groping your dollar shitting ass!"

"I can handle Vince." John said, laughter still in his voice. "If you don't wipe it off now it's gonna get real uncomfortable." Randy looked at him momentarily,then unbuckled his belt. "I'm already uncomfortable Johnny. I feel so sticky."

John arched his eyebrow mischievously which Randy noticed and quickly added,laughter in his own voice. "...from the sugar in the soda you pervert! I need some water."

John raised his hands in defense and smiled. "I'd love to help you buddy but I'm out of water too. I guess you'll have to wait it out till you get home."

"In this mess?" Randy asked and John nodded looking away to hide his laughter. "Come on John. Surely there must be something we can do. My ass feels like it's been sewn together."

John looked thoughtful, then turned to Randy with a coy smile. "Well, there is something..."

The partners had always had a thing for each other but it was never spoken out loud. It was the little comments, the innuendoes, the fleeting touches that spoke volumes about their attraction towards each other.

"Do tell. But if it involves me getting out of this car you can forget it." John laughed. "You're one to give demands. No your highness, you won't get out of the car. You might not get out of your seat either."

Randy sighed dramatically. "Your sarcasm is very appreciated. Just tell me what to do, genius." John did not say a word as he adjusted both seats to give them more room. He then straddled Randy and gave him a long intense kiss. "I'm gonna lick all that sugary stickiness away Randy, that's my master plan."

John whispered in Randy's ear and pulled off the unbuckled belt. He popped the button, unzipped the jeans and pulled them down. "You always did have a sweet tooth Johnny." Randy said winking.

John slapped Randy's thigh playfully then darted his tongue on the semi erect shaft through the briefs, earning a sharp intake of breath from Randy. John pulled the briefs down and feasted his eyes on the huge cock,then spit on his palm and wrapped it on the now fully hard shaft. He started moving it up and down in a circular motion as Randy closed his eyes and enjoyed the sensation.

John then bent his head and licked off the precum,pressing his tongue lightly on the slit. He took the head of the cock in his mouth and started a slow lazy suck,swirling his tongue around it then clamping his mouth on it. Randy breathed hard and whispered. "Feels so fucking good."

"You taste like sugar,and cola." John said and began inching further down, relaxing his mouth muscles so he could accommodate Randy's huge tumescence. He bobbed his head up and down until Randy's cock disappeared in his mouth deep throating him.

"God Johnny!" Randy exhaled and bucked up as the back of John's throat caressed his sensitive head. John could not hold his breath any longer and released him,licking the vein tantalizingly making Randy thrust his hips. John teased the balls sucking each sac into his mouth and tantalizing it with his tongue and teeth.

"Fuck Johnny! Feels amazing!" Randy moaned. John smiled and wordlessly trailed his tongue to Randy's crack wiping the sticky sugar off. He teased the pucker, dipping the tip of his tongue in and out of Randy's hole. Randy writhed and moaned and bucked as John's teasing took him to heights he had not experienced in while.

"Is my master plan helping at all?" John asked as he ceased his teasing and straddled Randy, capturing his mouth.

"Your master plan is brilliantly helpful Johnny because now I want more. I want all of this." Randy replied,putting his hands on John's ass and pressing him down. John,smiling, took off his pants and turned around, his hands on the dashboard for support. "Rim me."

Randy squeezed the bare cheeks then began placing fleeting kisses all over them. He traced his tongue from the top of John's crack down to his pucker,biting playfully the hard flesh that covered the pink hole. He swirled his tongue around the hole, alternating between inserting his index finger and the tip of his tongue.

John clenched his ass every time a finger went in,trapping it inside while stroking his own hardness. Randy licked him wet,pushing in saliva that would act as the lube. "Shit Randy! I'm ready."

Randy ceased his ministrations and spit on his palm,spreading it on his shaft and gave a few firm strokes then gently pulled John down. He watched as the veined cock disappeared inch by inch into John's hole until it was buried inside. John began moving up and down on the large tumescence rhythmically, his cock bobbing up and down with every move.

"You're so tight around me Johnny." Randy breathed as he held onto John's hips, lifting him up and down as he watched himself get pleasured. "So fucking tight."

John got hold of his swinging member and started fisting it as he increased his pace of grinding and slapping his ass on Randy's lap. Randy's eyes were closed and his head thrown back as he concentrated on how good he was feeling as his cock slid in and out of John's slick hole. They changed positions, Randy placing John under him on fours and continued thrusting deeply into him, constantly hitting on his spot with this new angle.

"Oh fuck!" John moaned as his spot got hammered on by Randy's massive cock. "Feels so good Ran. Fuck me harder."

Randy increased his thrusting, mercilessly pounding into John as deep as his length would allow. All that could be heard from the two men were moans, groans, slapping sounds and the labored breathing as the fog of their pleasure thickened.

"Holy fucking shit John!" Randy cried out. "You're so fucking hot!" He drawled as he felt his release approaching. "I'm gonna cum soon Johnny."

John was fisting his length with lightning speed as his own orgasm started building in the pit of his stomach. Randy pulled out of John's pulsating pucker and turned him on his back and the men stroked their cocks almost in unison, urging their eminent release out, eyes never leaving each other.

John was the first to release, a groan escaping his throat as he shot his creamy thick load on his abs and abdomen. Randy followed soon after his own pearly jizz shooting up onto John's chest. They gazed into each other's eyes as the last drop of their sexual culmination escaped their manhood,many words unspoken as they came back from the post orgasmic haze.

"Wow Johnny!" Randy began as he wiped John off with the discarded hand towel. "That was some amazing sex!"

John smiled as he pulled his pants back on. "It was. You should make clumsiness your routine when we are together. It'll give me an excuse to want to clean you up."

"That's a very good idea Johnny. I wouldn't mind wanting to clean you up as well so, how about I buy you some non sticky drink tomorrow?" Randy replied winking and smiling back.

"Sounds like a plan." John said,winking back.

They men sat back on their seats,the unspoken words seemingly loud enough, and continued with the stakeout each man anticipating more nights to come.

_**Another one shot on the way,depending on the forgiveness I get, so,**_

_**FORGIVEN? :))**_

**Please Review...**


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